Have dinner with my parent just now ... They came to my house, wanted to find Jerald more often before I go for deliver I guess ^.^ somehow I wish they could help me look after Jerald when I'm on confiment because I still worried to let my in law look after ...
In future there will be two kids already ... I really don't know what should I do!!!? I'm really those kind that wanna stay at home and look after my kids, I rather put them at child care ... So I can go for work and I could fetch them home after work ...
My in law are really old already my heart just don't feel safe to leave them at home with them ... Sighhhh! Most of the time I don't want to mention anything or even comment all my thoughts to anyone or even hubby. Because I know it will be sensitive to everyone, so the only thing I could do is to be silent and torture myself ...
To torture myself just because I cannot do or even said anything ... Selfish or stupid !? Whatever ... I'm not the only one that is selfish and disrespect of ... I'm don't said or even talk back it's because I respect you all ... If everything still won't change, just prepare to bury me !
Yes! Most of the time I can be really negative because I'm a mother already... And I'm a emotional person ... This is me~ nothing can change! ... I'll only just tolerate with everything but just hope one day I won't explode and gone forever ... LOL!!!
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